A New Beginning...

Every once in a while in life, you are inspired to do those things that you never dreamed were possible. Sometimes, those things require a little planning (as is true for what I’m about to talk about)…other times it takes no planning at all. For those instances that require no planning, all it takes is determination. For the times when planning is required, determination must be backed up by action.

For the last couple months or so, I have been trying to find a new job. Everyone that reads this blog knows about all the crap that I have to put up with on a daily basis, which is probably normal for a university setting (who can say for sure?). I have been doing all that I can do to try and find this new job…and I think that’s why I’ve been failing at it miserably (thank you for the book, Saint…of all people, you know exactly what I mean). When one tries their hardest to get to a thing, the further that thing moves from them. It’s when you have a still, quiet moment that the true nature of not only yourself, but also your future will make itself clear.

So…let’s quickly go over a lot of the things that I like: 1) I like to read (everyone knows that)…but the books that I like to read are action/adventure books, or books that have exciting things happening in them. 2) I like to work on computers…anything dealing with the tearing down of, or repairing of computers I find enjoyable. 3) I like to play on computers…I have so many games on my computer, it’s crazy. From flight sims to first person shooters to strategy games…I’ll play all types. 4) I like planes. I’ve always wanted to fly (my first dream job was to be an Astronaut) and I still wish I had a private pilots license.

Now, a job for me now would ideally involve me moving somewhere, be a job that was very organized and structured, one that didn’t turn into the same-old-same-old (you know what I mean) and one that was personally rewarding. Now, ideally, it would also be nice to include some of the things that I like (please see the above list). Who, in their right mind, wouldn’t want to be paid to do some of the things that they liked? I know I would.

So, that is everything that I’ve been trying to find lately…I’ve been wasting all this time trying to find a job that not only fit my wants, but also my needs. You want to know what changed? Two things: First, I received a letter from a very good friend of mine who I will call “Raptor” (you lucky bastard!). Raptor is now in the process of taking what could very well be one of the biggest life changes that he could ever take. Sir, I salute you…and you have inspired me. I, too, want to realize my dreams. To become what I’ve always wanted. Granted, my road will take a different, and slightly longer path that yours, but I, too, shall get there. Second, I just finished the book that my friend Saint (code name used to protect the goofy) gave to me. I personally think that it is one of those books that different things will happen to different people, depending on what you start to read it for. I read it for clarification and guidance…and have become determined to make a new start. How will I start? By doing nothing…and going nowhere. The answer is always right there in front of you.

So, if the answer is right there in front of me, why wasn’t I able to see it? Quite simply, because I was looking for it. It’s one of those “as soon as I quit looking for this thing, I found what I was really looking for.” And most times, the answer isn’t what you are expecting at all. Such is the case here…kinda.

I have decided to go talk to a recruiter for the United States Air Force. I don’t want to be an army of one…I want to be a part of a team. A team that is organized, dedicated and wonderfully structured. A team in which something new happens every single day. A team in which I can further my career and learn new technologies. A team that is as personally rewarding as I make it. I want to fly. Now, granted, I’ll never be a pilot (I have corrected vision), but I could very easily fulfill some other slot and make a difference.

This is now my goal. This is now my dream.

The Agony of Defeat...

Well, the last couple weeks have been rather interesting. I know it’s been a while since I posted, but…truth be told…I did write something at the midpoint of last week, and I posted it…but for some reason, it was deleted and will never return again. It was a long, glorious piece in which I used all of my creative talents (all two of them). I laughed and cried while writing it. Anyway, it was only on the Internet for the amount of time it took me to write it, and now it’s gone. So…I start a new.

I’ve taken up running as a form of self-torture, and it’s been working quite well. It works well as a torture device, not a weight loss aid or anything else healthy that I can easily notice anyway. That is not to say that I don’t enjoy myself when I run. Quite the contrary. I’ve had a blast! How, then, can torture be fun? Well…it’s all a mental game anyway, so I have fun with that aspect. For an example, take the race that I won First Place in…(insert dreamy look and hazy memories)

It was several weekends ago now, exactly when I can’t quite remember, but that is quite beyond the point. Anyway, it was a nice day and I went for a nice, short 5K run here in Ruston. It was a race put on by Add-Life Fitness Center (where I have a membership…do I get a month free for the free advert?!) and involved several nice hills. Anyway, 1 block into the race, and my MP3 player’s battery decided to die on me. I don’t know what the deal was with it, but it really was a letdown. Well, I plodded along for a bit with my legs screaming at me from mouths that had grown from my shins. Lo and behold! There is a girl riding a bike!!! “Hey, can I borrow your bike for 5 minutes?!” I ask hopefully. “This is a new bike. I don’t want sweaty people on it.” Gee…thanks little girl. At one point, we had to run up this hill that was like 4 blocks long and a nice grade, turn around and run back down it. I was about 1/3 the way up and someone was coming down (towards me). I jogged in place and then turned around and began to run down the hill only to be chastised by the lady. Sheesh…I was only kidding! Anyway, I finished the race and got first place. Well, first place in my age group anyway. Well, granted…I was the only one in my age group that ran…but that’s beside the point.

The race that I ran in this last Saturday was rainy, windy and cold. Well, cold is a relative thing and it really wasn’t bad, but the wind REALLY made it feel worse than it really was. I finished that race also, but not in first place. It was a great day in spite of the cold, wind and rain, and I still had a blast. Also, for those not in the Ruston area, NE Louisiana is kinda hilly, and I developed a new maxim for runners in NE Louisiana: "What goes downhill must come up."

Oh, Mr. Pilot Friend…that thing that you were telling me to look out for – It happened on Friday, so no more worries. ;-)
-LT